The morning after I called the police on my unborn child’s father for beating my ten pound dog viciously with a broom I woke up alone in my bed with my dog cuddled beside me. Maybe last night was a really bad dream I thought to myself.
Jhavier made me hot dogs and eggs smothered in ketchup for breakfast. I was so concerned about eating healthy that I didn’t want hot dogs, I really don’t like eggs and I hate when people pour condiments all over my food.
“I wanted to do something nice for you. I don’t know how things got so bad between us Janay. You just know how to push my buttons” Jhavier said.
“Thank you, but I’m not hungry” I forced myself to say with a smile.
As soon as the words left my mouth Jhavier threw the whole plate at me. Ketchup, eggs, and chopped up hot dogs landed all over my bed, and all I could think was I can’t have his baby. I didn’t have the energy to fight back or clean up the mess. I just cried. I wasn’t crying because he hurt me I was crying because I was mad. I hated myself for getting pregnant by a man that couldn’t control his anger. I hated myself and I hated Jhavier. I hated myself more than anything.
One hour later I still sat in the mess crying and trying to figure out how I would get away from Jhavier for good. Enough was enough and I couldn’t take anymore. Jhavier started feeling bad and apologized. He explained that he was upset about me being ungrateful. He explained he was trying to get us back to how things were when we first met, but he didn’t feel like I loved him anymore. I reassured him that I did love him, and I was willing to try to make things work. It was time for him to go to work and I was excited to see him go. He kissed me on my forehead and left out the back door.
When Jhavier came home from work we didn’t speak. I stayed in the bedroom and he went to sleep on the couch. I couldn’t sleep. I was too sad to sleep. I was a broken women pregnant by a man who didn’t love, respect or value her, and that thought made me physically sick to my stomach. I ran to the bathroom and vomited, and then I laid back down. Jhavier woke up and came to the bedroom. I thought he was checking on me to make sure I was okay, but boy was I wrong.
The next thing I knew Jhavier was standing over me pouring water from the dirty dish bucket all over me. I was soaked from head to toe, and I was furious. Enough was enough I couldn’t allow Jhavier to disrespect me any longer. I leaped off that bed like a raging bull trying to attack Jhavier for throwing the water on me, but he threw me back on the bed. He knocked my glasses off my face, threw my phone, and then turned the light off in the bedroom. I was so scared, because I did not know what Jhavier was planning to do, however I had a bad feeling. He shut all the windows in the room, and I thought to myself he doesn’t want people to hear me scream.
“You have to leave I just can’t live like this anymore Jhaiver. Please just go” I cried nervously.
“I would leave but I can’t you pregnant remember, and you don’t have a job. Your sick you need money for your medicine. You’re really a dumb bitch” he said.
“I don’t need you I can find another man to take care of me and my baby” I said.
I shouldn’t have said that, and I knew it the moment the words left my mouth, but it was too late. Jhavier leaped on top of me hitting me in my stomach repeatedly. I was screaming to the top of my lungs trying to fight back. I needed someone to hear me and save me. “I’m still pregnant” I yelled. “I’m pregnant” I yelled again and again. I was trying to stomp my feet on the floor and I just kept yelling. It felt like he was on top of me hitting me forever. It was dark in that room, but I could see the evil in his eyes.
My cousin who was also my downstairs neighbor came banging on the door. “Let me cousin go I called the police she said”. She came there just in time because Jhavier may have killed me, or my baby. Jhavier got off me and ran once he heard my cousin. I could already hear the police outside they had the apartment surrounded. The police where everywhere and I could hear Jhavier try to run out the back. The police got him.
One officer came to me and asked me what I wanted to do. I told him that I wanted to press charges on Jhavier. He was acting like a wild animal and I was sure that he would have killed me in that apartment if my cousin didn’t call the police.
“Are you sure you want to press charges. If you do you will be required to go to court” the police said.
I felt like he didn’t want me to press charges. I felt like he was talking to me like he thought I was another dumb girl in a domestic violence situation.
“Yes I want to press charges. He needs to go to jail” I said.
“Then you will need to give a written statement” the policeman said. I wrote a statement and he gave me instructions on how to get a temporary restraining order.
“Do you need medical attention? Do you want to go to the hospital?” the cop asked. I should’ve went to the hospital, but I didn’t want to all I wanted to do was sleep. I was still in shock and I couldn’t admit to myself that I put my baby in harm’s way. I knew that Jhavier was violent and I stayed. I hated myself, and I wasn’t ready to sit in a hospital full of people judging me.
“No I’ll be fine” I said on the verge of tears. The officer asked me a few questions that they ask people involved in domestic violence situations. To my surprise I answered yes to all the questions I was really an abused woman.
When I went back to my apartment and the back door was still open. It took me awhile to find my glasses and my phone and once I did I feel asleep on the couch still wearing my wet shirt.
That night I would toss and turn in my sleep wondering if Jhavier would get out. I was scared and nervous I didn’t want to see him ever again. I thought about my actions and the role I had played in situation. Yes I was wrong for saying that to Jhavier, but that didn’t give him a reason to hit me. He was hitting me in my stomach it was all just too much for me to take in at that moment.
The next morning I would text my friends and family and tell them that Jhavier was arrested. Things only got worst from there.
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So glad you were brave enough to not be discouraged from pressing charges.
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This sounds like a nightmare. I’m sorry you’re going through it. I hope you get a restraining order against him as he IS very dangerous. You don’t need him to raise a child; there are lots of single parents out here.
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Thank you for reading. I did get a restraining order and I am a single mother. I’m just sharing my story to hopefully help someone else in that situation. 💚
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You are so brave for doing this yet I am so so sorry you had to. Nobody has to go through this, this is unfair and totally scary
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Thank you for reading 💚 even though this happened almost 5 years ago it was still hard for me to relive this moment and write about it. Hopefully I’m helping someone by sharing this story.
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You story will sure help many others! Thank you so much for sharing this!!
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What strength and admiration to see you write all this! Very good!
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I hope a lot of abused women will get to read this. This has got to be one of the scariest things that could happen to a woman. You are gonna help a lot of people who are in the same situation by sharing your story. Glad you got out.
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Thank you! I just hope I can help one or more women by sharing my story.
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Whoa so many emotions flowing threw me right now! This is a very courageous thing you did putting your story out there for others to read. God bless you and your child! Wishing you nothing but love and light 💫💕
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Thank you ❤️
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Wow I’m so sorry you went through that. I hope your story will bring you healing and help others!
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This is such an important subject. I’m so sorry you went through all of this.
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Getting away from domestic violence is tough. I’m glad to hear that you were strong enough to press charges. Stay strong ❤
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Wow, I am sorry you are going through this. No one deserves to deal with stuff like this, that’s for sure.
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So glad you are safe and okay. Thanks for sharing your story it’s very brave and courageous of you. God bless you and your child.
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So sorry to hear that this guy did this to you. To think if your cousin was not home at the time.
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Just happy you as well as the baby are fine.
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What an awful nightmare for you I am glad you managed to breakfree in the end, it sometimes is so hard to walk away as much as you know you should, they make you feel like it is all you.
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Thanks for reading 💚 and your so right it’s hard for so many women to leave these situations. Hopefully sharing my story will help someone get the strength to walk away before it’s too late!
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So sorry you have to go through this. You are very brave and courageous. Glad you and baby are fine. No one deserves this. god bless you and your baby.
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The fact that you even shared your story is amazing and so strong. I am so sorry you went through this, but think of all the other women you will be helping with this story. I am just shocked that the police tried to discourage you from pressing charges. Infuriating.
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I think the police just see this kind of situation play out too many times and they are used to women not going through with pressing charges. A lot of women end up not pressing charges or pressing them and then dropping them.
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I am glad you had the strength to press charges and leave. It is such a brave and hard thing to do.
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This sounds horrific. Nobody should have to go through anything like this. Stay strong!!
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It is really sad that it had to come to this but I’m glad that the police came on time.
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I’ve been there. I am so blessed and thankful that I am no longer in that kind of abusive relationship. Reading this reminds me of what I have experienced.
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I’m glad you got out too! No one should have to deal with abuse!
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Enough is enough! Sometimes, you just have to stand your feet and not take up more harrassment. I’m glad you didn’t stand in for the abuse.
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I’m glad you got out. It is so hard to leave, and takes a lot of courage to do it!
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After reading this I am really sad that you had to come through. Glad you come out. I am sure your story will help out many girls who are abused in the same or any other way.
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I am so sorry you had to experience this. Praying peace on your life
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OMG this is horrible. I’m so sorry you had to go through this. Thank you for sharing your story and being so brave! I think all women need to read this blog. Your strength is contagions.
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This is so hard to read, cause it breaks my heart every single time. Nobody deserves to be treated that way and certainly not a pregnant woman.
“I hated myself more than anything”, wow, I feel the pain and the anger. Those are tough words but the important thing is that you found the courage to press charges, that’s self love, that progress, that’s life.
Looking forward to your next post!
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Thank you for reading! I’m glad I found the courage to share my story! Hopefully it can help someone in a similar situation 💚
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Domestic violence is not allowed in this age, thanks for sharing your story with us. Glad to learn that you have taken up this with the Police.
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This is horrible. Such tough situation and always hard to get out of it. Good on your for pressing charges.
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What a tough situation to be in. I don’t think you did anything wrong at all.
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God. Such a horrible situation to be in!
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what a brave woman you are, props!
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Thank you ❤️
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I’m so sorry for what did you have to live but I’m glad that now it’s over and you are fine. You’re very brave telling us your story and letting us be part of your world.
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You have an amazing amount of strength to get yourself out of this situation and to share your story. I’m sure you’ll be helping someone in a similar situation find their own strength too.
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thanks for sharing. I’m sure it’s hard to put this out there in the public, so I hope someone reads this and feels inspired by your decisions and does the same.
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Thank you ❤️ I really hope my story helps someone!
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I am so sorry you have to go through this but am so proud that you stood up for your self and took a stand. No one has the right to treat you like that, there is no excuse. I hope you are doing well! ❤
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Horrifying. Thank God your cousin got there on time. I’m shocked.
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I am glad that you take action yes it is difficult when we hurt from our loved ones. But we need to get back our life.
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This is really a great post and thanks for sharing your experience so that it will be helpful to other people. Thanks for sharing this post.
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What a hard story to read, beautiful! But thanks for sharing it, so much to learn and encourage other women who are going through it.
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Thanks for sharing your story and being so brave. Nobody and no child should ever have to be put in the situation you were in. But unfortunately it happens, and I hope someone reads this and gets the courage to get out.
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I hope that you and the baby are in good health and he is not making any scene. A lot of women loose their lives in the name of its ok.You did the right thing to press charges. http://www.thecozyme.com
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Sometimes The best weapon against all is loving ourself more. Loving ourself to not deal with unhealthy situations. Good for you…for making the decision to love yourself more!
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Thank you! 💕
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You showed strength and bravery standing up for yourself. Thank you for sharing your story. Take good care.
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Sad to hear this. hope everything turns out well in the future. =(
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This is a really traumatic experience. You are a very strong lady. May things go better for you.
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I’m sorry you ever had to go through this. I’m glad you’re out of this situation, now and I hope your story helps another woman in need.
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I’m so glad you were strong enough to get out of that relationship, for yourself and your child. Thank you for sharing, I hope it helps others to find their courage!
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No one should have to endure the pain you are facing or be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love and respect them. I commend you for making the decision to kick him out and press charges. Your safety and your baby’s safety should come first.
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I think domestic violence is not justified, no matter whether you are in India or US. I think It should be reported and there is no reason why you should be in such a bad relationship ever.
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Thank you for reading! I really agree domestic violence shouldn’t be tolerated anywhere! 💚
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